When you are feeling very human

Make the most of your Monday

Once upon a time, I asked my daughter to turn on the oven. She was nine and alone in the house. Before long, smoke began to billow out, probably because there was something spattered on the bottom of the oven. Since it was winter in Minnesota, my daughter was sure she shouldn’t open any windows. She went to the door leading out to the garage and opened and closed it a few times. Then she laid down to die.

It’s easy to look at that girl on the floor with tenderness, because we’ve all been there. Or at least somewhere close to there. You did something, and whether it was your fault or not, the situation went sideways, so why not lay down and wait for the end?

In that moment, it can be hard to look at yourself with a soft-heartedness. The impulse is often the opposite—to sit your a$$ on top of a fire ant mound and let them relentlessly sting the tender pieces of you.

Here’s the thing. You will mess up. As will I.

Here’s even more bad news. Not only will you mess up, but sometimes, in your attempt to repair things, you might make it worse. Ugh.

All you can change or affect is what happens next.

That can be overwhelming, so think small. What is a next step? Not the next step, because that creates too much pressure. What is one thing, one small thing, you can think to do next?

To answer that question, it can be helpful to get quiet. To breathe and breathe some more.

And before you do anything else, take a moment and see yourself for what you are—a human being who has done a very human thing. A human who right here, right now needs kindness and care.

As we all do.

So, breathe. Look at yourself and others with tenderness, especially when life gets hard and things go sideways. Make the small choices that move you from here to there.

And if you can, don’t make your life harder by choosing to put ants in your pants.

Live light, y’all.